What we’re about
Integrated Men is a No More Mr. Nice Guy support group, a community of men based on the works of Dr. Robert Glover the leading authority on the subject. We welcome men from all walks of life and provide a safe space for men to start learning to be their authentic self. Having read the book is not important to join the group, but if the description below chimes with you, and you wish to make necessary life changes, join our group.
If you are not familiar with the above-mentioned body of work I would recommend starting with the book No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover and getting familiar with the core concepts discussed in our group meetings.
Nice Guys have been conditioned to believe that if they are "good" and do everything "right", they will be loved, get their needs met, and have a smooth life. Sound too good to be true? It is. This belief is a myth, which only leaves Nice Guys feeling frustrated, lonely, and powerless.
Dr. Glover says:
An integrated male takes responsibility for getting his own needs met.
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This group is about taking Full Responsibility for our lives instead of blaming others for our life situations. Time and again we fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others' lives and situation. The goal is to forge our own lives based on our own set of values and purpose.
There is nothing wrong with being nice. But the Nice Guy does it to seek approval and avoid rejection. He's a people-pleaser. He constantly sets his own needs and wants aside, and pretends to be something he's not, in order to make other people happy. Suppressing his authenticity does not work for long. The Nice Guy eventually blows up in a rage, passive-aggressive behavior, or compulsive sexual acting out. Nice Guys do not feel that it's safe to be exactly who they are and therefore are secretive, manipulative, and very unhappy.
We are a group of men who want to start taking control of ourselves and our lives. We have seen that we cannot do it alone. The group aims to provide a safe space for men to have difficult conversations without fear of judgment.
We pledge to help, support, and encourage one another in our journey to become Integrated Males. We strive to:
- • Stop seeking the approval of others.
- • Learn effective ways to get our needs met.
- • Feel more powerful and confident.
- • Create the kind of intimate relationships we really want.
- • Learn to express our feelings and emotions.
- • Have a fulfilling and exciting sex life.
- • Embrace our masculinity and have meaningful relationships with other men.
- • Live up to our potential and become truly creative and productive.
- • Accept ourselves just as we are.
- • Live with total integrity.
If these are things you want in your life, please join us! Any adult male is welcome, regardless of relationship status, position in life, religious beliefs, or sexual orientation. We strive to make our meetings safe for all.
Our support/discussion group meetings are held every Tuesday night and last about 2 hours. Along with our Wednesday night meetings, we also meet in-person at least twice a month over the weekends. We also do plenty of other group activities to give you a chance to bond with our group of amazing men.
Even though we take the principal themes for our meetings from the book "No More Mr. Nice Guy", by Dr. Robert Glover, we also use other inspirational books and materials to enhance our discussions. Join us and start getting what you want in life, love, and relationships!
Please read the following
Community Values and Guidelines
• Respect for the rights, differences, and dignity of others
• Respect confidentiality.
• Honesty and integrity in dealing with all members of the community
• Accountability for personal behavior
• Live an authentic life.
• A pursuit of vulnerability through sharing of personal experiences.
• Being fully present (And listen actively).
• Discover your personal passion.
• Accept that everyone is on their own journey.
• Support others as they pursue an authentic life.
• Respect women. (without putting them on a pedestal and treat them as equals)
• Be an example to children.
• Honor your commitments. (Keep your word.)
• Strive to build a community spirit.
• Know our responsibilities.
Members shall refrain from pursuing other members for the sole purpose of personal gain or personal agenda.
Members shall refrain from creating disruptions within the group.
By attending the meetings, I agree with the community values and vow to withhold the code.
Membership Requirements
We advocate authenticity, and this is the first and important step towards it. Please follow these guidelines to ensure that your request for membership is approved swiftly.
As part of the membership process we require that all members meet the following requirements:
• Have an appropriate Meetup profile picture
• Provide their name.
This is a paid group, that is, to attend the meeting, you need to sign up as a paid member.
If you are ready to begin your journey head over to the Sign Up page at https://apply.integratedmen.net/ready-join
Thank you.