Chattanooga Outdoor Adventures

Note: This is in the Ish time Zone. I will be driving from Alabama to my place and walking over. If I hit a traffic jam because the Krispy Kreme truck flipped and people are stopping to grab a donut and it's causing a traffic jam I could be late and glazed.

"We ate well and cheaply and drank well and cheaply and slept well and warm together and loved each other." Ernest Hemingway-A Moveable Feast

I like that quote from Hemingway. I was told recently I live like a college kid. I really liked that. Simple, cheap, and a small place downtown. I have what I need and friends. Doesn't get much better than that.I am living simpler and happier these days.

Another Friday night late night bites. I wanted to eat here when it was the Flying Squirrel. I never had squirrel before. Does a flying squirrel taste like chicken? It closed and came back as Earnest Chinese. Guess I will never know restaurant quality squirrel.

Back when I lived in Upstate NY we had an Apple tree that did not produce good apples. We would pick them up and throw them in a pit out back. The fluffy tailed tree rats would let them ferment a bit. Pull them out and eat them on our picnic table and get tanked. Apparently squirrels can throw a pretty righteous party.

Now the place is called Ernest Chinese. It is a short walk from my place to there. I like cats I just can't eat a whole one by myself. See the owners rebooted the place from the Flying Squirrel to Ernest Chinese. On their Bio they tell the tale of naming the restaurant after the co-owner Dan's Tabby cat Ernest who lived on site. Curiously there is no cause of death listed for the cat and there is a menu item listed as General Ern's "Chicken". Okay, so I added the quotes around Chicken, but they open a Chinese place and the cats suddenly gone? Seems suspicious, but possibly delicious. Anyways I am sure the dish is Purrrrfect.

Their signature dishes are Gong Bao "Chicken", Dan Dan Noodles (Dan is still alive so no worries there, I hope. Has anyone seen Dan Lately?), and Mongolian Beef (any missing Mongolians?).

American Chinese favorites are General Ern's "Chicken" (Meow), Crab Rangoon and Egg Fried Rice

Sichuan Specialties include Mapo Tofu (we need a map for tofu?) Cold Sichuan Noodles, and Salt and Pepper Shrimp (Push it real good).

They have a full Tiki bar. The Tiki bar is not Polynesian. It is an L.A. invention. However unauthentic I can still get behind it. I want a drink with an Umbrella.

**This is the Third time they say it's a charm... like me! ;)

We scheduled this hike when we cancelled because of the snow on the 11th. Rain a month later. I wanted to repost it and give enough time for people to sign up. Nothing new here in the writeup I recycled, but the details are below. I know its Church day for some, but I am playing hooky that day. Plus it is one of the days our own Susan can make it and if she doesn't go I would be hungry when we stop at snack time. She has taken care of me a time or two with extra snacks! Thanks Mom!

A Little Drunk History from a sober Dude

I was curious why a Christian Liberal Arts college had trails there celebrating Moonshine and its aliases. I am betting this is not a place known for Keg parties and late night debauchery.

Debauchery is even a fun sounding word, but back to the conservative school.

A perusal of their clubs and organizations backs this up.

Badminton Club- For you youngster think pickle ball popularity at one time. That time was the 1930's. One day Pickleball will be the badminton of our era.

Bag Pipe Club-The difference between a bagpipe and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe. First Rule of Bagpipe club, don't play the bagpipe.

Growers club-I paused for a second on this. My mind went somewhere else. I thought isn't that also called the devils lettuce? Church school? I mean social acceptance is really growing, but at a conservative school? Apparently it's to grow your understanding and faith. NOT where my mind initially went on what they would be growing.

There are more clubs along these lines.

So it seems like a wholesome place in a beautiful setting, but Moonshine?

The trails were originally called the Gerber Branch area, named after a distiller who continued to produce corn liquor after Prohibition. An entrepreneur of sorts. Visitors can still find piles of bottles near the trails.

Apparently Gerber was kind of a big deal in the production of stump water, skullcracker, wildcat, ruckus juice, Hill Billy pop, and donkey punch. Also known as moonshine.

Ruckus Juice cracks me up.

The Moonshine Trails are a series of trails that branch off from the Chattanooga Connector Trail. The four trails that make up the Moonshine Trails are the Chattanooga Connector Trail, Firewater, White Lightning, and Bathtub Gin.

The trail names seem appropriate for the history, but Bathtub Gin? As long as the Bathtub used wasn't the one at my Fraternity house in college I think you'd be okay. I am pretty sure even the alcohol wouldn't kill the things growing in that tub. The tub at my apartment in college? better... mostly. Would I drink Gin from it? Nope. I might serve it to guests, but me? No.

So we meet at the trail head. Here is a description from All Trails